How Dad influences our Work
And what it can mean
I had another post ready to go. About pundits and truth and job hunting.
And. Father’s Day.
My Dad had a big influence on me. We were very close until the day he died and I feel that we’re still close now. He does his best to send little “hellos” from wherever he is in the ether - at just the moment that I’m doubting my place on this planet and the work that I purport to do.
He taught me the power of relationships in building a business.
Bob - Dad to me - was a commission only salesman for more than 50 years. That means he didn’t have a base salary, nor did he have a pension and the only retirement plan he had was one he funded himself. He sold envelopes for most of his life. He would take on other gigs too - selling encyclopedias door to door, becoming a licensed Realtor(r), and in his “retirement” building a new business in a new state selling advertising specialties.
Even when he was sick (he had cancer for a VERY long time) he worked - his monthly newsletter was a point of pride, as were his regular trips around the Tidewater area, along with Mom, to deliver quote-a-day tear off calendars bearing the Arvi logo. That winter of 2019 my sister and her husband finished the task when he was too sick to go out.
All this to tell you about my work ethic and commitment to treating everyone as an individual human - meeting them where they are. Dad taught me that customers can become friends - in fact - I was in my thirties when I realized that one of the “Uncle Bills” we had (the one that was not my dad’s brother) had become a close family friend because he was one of my Dad’s clients early in his career. In his final months here on the planet, in addition to family and neighbors stopping in to say hello, there were so many calls from friends - and I’d ask, “How do you know so and so” and he’d tell me that he’d sold them binders, or name tags or simply met them in a local networking group.
To say my Dad has influenced my work is an understatement.
And, here’s the thing.
I have another Dad. I didn’t meet him until I was in my 50s. I only pursued finding him because the search for my bio mother ended in disappointment because she’d died 18 years before I found the family.
That man, the dad I had never met also had an integral part in forming my work identity. He had been a defense attorney - a choice he made (to my understanding) because he believed everyone deserved the right to a fair trial and because the thought of having to kowtow in a system built for partnership tracks just wasn’t how he wanted to spend his life. In retirement he enjoys cooking, tending to his prolific garden and until recently, tinkering with his antique roadster. He finds joy in simple things, spending time with his family and building relationships. He is committed to using the power of logic to focus on truth and justice - especially for those who cannot fight for themselves.
I’m lucky. I have positive relationships with both of these Dads. Reflecting on the influence that they both have on me and the way I choose to make my way in the world reminds me that none of us choose our work and careers in a vacuum. Whether as a reflection or a rejection of those paternal influences, our work seems to carry the legacy of those that went before us.
For you. Today. If Father’s Day is hard I see you. If Father’s Day is a day of joy and laughter, I see you too.
Big hugs,
Peggie
As always, thanks for reading. If there’s a way I can help you - let me know. Feel free to like and share if you wish.
Interesting! My dad-who-raised-me was 100% a salesman. He sold phone systems for Cincinnati Bell and later sold real estate. He even hooked up buyers with cars, although he wasn't a certified car salesman....but he had a hell of a network via sales, and if he knew people who knew people who wanted things, he'd make some calls. I am not a salesperson. I have had too many life lessons that say you can't make someone buy something they don't really want. (They will return it if they do.) I did work retail for a while. I do believe that whenever my dad sold something or what he brokered or sold, he did it ethically. That was his big lesson to me, whatever you do, be ethical. My birth father was a total blue-collar factory worker (GM). He was in the Navy before that.My work takeaways from him: 1- All jobs should be respected, regardless of education level or salary. We all have a role to fill; we are all needed somewhere. 2- Do your work right (again, ethically and well) and then go have fun! 3- You do not have to agree with everything politically in your country or the politicians, but always support your troops. Respect those who serve.